This Significant Memory

Perhaps I never knew it, perhaps I knew it all along. I was never too certain.

 

The only thing that I was certain about, was that the friendship that we shared was a comfortable one. It was the kind where we enjoyed each other's company and laughing at your silly jokes. I believe you enjoyed my company, as I always see you smiling at me when you see me walking through the corridor. You flashed the same kind of smile that Syam would share with me when I walk through the office door and greet her in the morning, and it had the same kind of aura that would have surrounded my old office when I see Angel in the morning and she would greet me as I would to her. Also,the same type of contentment that would be when I see Denesh, Danial and Simon in the office too. It was nice, to know that my presence made a certain additional kind of happiness to another.

 

..And so I was never too certain..

 

Until that day when you made it certain for me.

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The start of the dinner was relaxing, with you trying to juggle between imparting your attention between the Liverpool match and I. Haha, l could tell you were struggling. Lol. Do you know which memory that night that was the fondest? It's the part when you asked me to read an article that you thought was interesting, and then when I read it, I realized that I'm familiar with the style of writing, and what really made me happy coupled with contentment was when you said you took it from my blog. It was a funny feeling, really. Funny, but in a nice, nice way, to have someone pluck some random note I wrote in the past and present it back to me to read as a third person. I'm was thinking "OMG someone in this world actually took what I wrote seriously. Awesome lol"

Thank you. To you. 

But it was a complicated night, and I believe, mostly for you, it was tumultuous. I know it was a difficult conversation for you to be in, as it was for me too. I'm so sorry if I ever offended you in speaking what I truly believe IS the truth, but it had to be done, in order for you to understand why I did what I did. In the car, I asked if you had anything to say before I left. What you didn't know, that what I was seeking from you, was an apology. I most certainly didn't expect that call with a whole different content after 2 minutes. 

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To this reader, You know who you are. I have to say thank you. Thank you, for firstly doing all the things you have done for me, for taking the extra miles to care for me, for reaching out to me even if it was unnecessary (driving from Klang to KL), and for everything in between. Perhaps I'm not as good as Google, and creative as you are in characteristic description (in your 25 words entry), but you were very sweet, amongst other things, and to be the nice person that you are, and having to treat me in a very special way, I am so grateful to have someone like you cherish me the way that you do. But most of all, to have the courage to tell me the honest truth. I know that you have been seeking for an answer from me for awhile now, but all that I can give to you is appreciation. 

I'll be around to hear you out, and I will offer you assistance when and if you need it, like what I have mentioned to you once upon a not-too-long ago on the way back from KL on a Saturday evening.

That still remains. 

 

 

 

lotsa love.

Let's Cheer, the Horse is here!

I always love CNY. Not because of the Ang POWs (I mean, of coz I love that, who doesn't???), but the idea that we would be in some random corner of the world is quite exciting. Plus, traveling with family is a breath of fresh air, from the usual day-to-day activity. :) And when it comes to spending for food, there is no compromise, which is why I'm growing sideways ever so quickly! But hey, weights can be lost, but memories that was lost can't be taken back, right? So damn the weight, and hellloooooooo Thailand!d

My journey to the land of the Thai has been an eye opener. Mostly it has strengthened yet again my gratefulness for being blessed with all that I have today. I see the plight of others, who, given the circumstances they were in, strive to make a decent living, even against adversities, and for that I respect them even more, because as we often sit and complain about the bitch our superiors are, or how the company benefits cannot substantiate with the high living costs, there are other people struggling out there to make ends meet. 

I have always known it, but I guess looking at them, I ask myself what kind of person I would like to be, when I become more successful one day. 

When I told Syam that we will be in Thailand for 9 days, she said we'll be bored to death. I laughed at that remark in an almost bitchy manner, (sorry babe, u know I love you right??) thinking that traveling with my dearest family will never ever be boring. True enough, on an average we woke up at 7.30am Thai time and finish the day at 10.00pm. We stayed at nice hotels and resorts, 4* at the least, and I was looking forward to using more of the pool, jacuzzis, spa and gym, but we've often been out that I've only managed to use it once. Soyeah, that's the reason I laughed at Syams remark. :) speaking of her, she sent me a MSG the last evening I was there. :) I miss u too darling! 

We have been so busy with our respective lives, that this trip was good to spend some quality time together. Dad was a darling, he planned the whole ground trip, and throughout the whole Thai trip, we traveled in our private vehicle. No coach, no taxis, no busses. I like. :) i mean sharing is caring, but hey, when you are on a holiday, more privacy is definitely good.  :)

Gosh, if I were to list the activities we did, this would be a super-super long entry! We did so many things, saw many temples, climbed on a few to reach the peak, took Thai style family photos, went on a private long-boat ride along Chao Phraya river, saw the 'Calypso' show where the ambience reminded me so much of Holland while I was there for one of the evening shows, ate dinner on a cruise, danced open-air disco with mom with the wind on our faces on that cruise (got compliments from a man *blush*), ate dinner at Bayou Sky Tower (food was quite disappointing) and saw Bangkok view at night, visited the King's summer home and the list goes on. Mind you, that was only in Bangkok. We went to Hua Hin too. Spent 3 days there, and several of my Europe trip experience was ignited. :) Gosh, the list goes on and on.. 

Ohh and not to mention the shopping! Like OMG..! *pengsan*

But what I like the most was the room that I was staying in Hua Hin.. I remembered opening the door of the hotel and was love struck, with the million-dollar view of the ocean from the entrance, and an even clearer view from the balcony. I have stayed in many, many hotels in my lifetime, and this one probably comes second after the hotel in Switzerland in terms of the view. The view was spectacular, really breath-taking. I actually woke up to watch the sunrise! I mean, ME! The pig that can't get her big arse out of bed even if the place was on fire hahah! I think it's also because I have a soft spot for sunsets. :) truly lovely. :)

Well, just thought of penning down what happened here before new memories make old memories grey.

I guess I'm a lucky girl.

Cheers.

Lotsa love.

That little Blue Box

In a foreign land

Upon a land 

That's similar to Santorini's

Upon the shades of white and blue

He was a familiar face

That made thoughts run to you

The gestures, the smile, the thoughtfulness

I wonder how

Two people can be so different 

but so alike..

And then I thought

How have you been since?

Have you been happy?

How are things different now

Than it was back then

For you? 

Have you forgotten about me?

Have you ever forgiven me?

Have I ever told you I'm sorry?

So many questions

Which I know..is of no use now.. 

Possibilities?

I know it's close to none

It was too much, for anyone to take

It scarred you

For eternity

Ever so often

Sometimes too often

My thoughts linger

To the time, the place, the journey we took

It was so long, so long ago

Yet it seemed like yesterday

Now I wonder, could we really have been? 

I don't know..

We'll never know.

I only hope you are happy now.

Always...