My Handsome, Loyal Rocky

Mdm Wong always says in her pitches, that in life, if one is ever lucky enough, then he or she would have the privilege of being born, growing old, getting sick, and returning to ashes. 

Some are fortunate enough to go through all four, some falters even at the first phase. 

Which is why I I try to remain positive and accepting when I look at Rocky. 

For most who don't know, I have another dog, his name is Rocky. Evidently belonging to sis, he has been with us for 13 years now. Despite little mentioning in this blog (I'm guilty, I mention more about ColB than him), he has been a loyal dog for so long, and for those who know me well enough, whenever I'm out 'walking the dog', it was Rocky that I was always referring to. ColB never walked, simply because he is just too lazy. Fat bum. 

The past few months have been spent being in and out of the veterinary hospital because of a series of incidence on Rocky's condition. Over and over again, there were incidences of maggots attacks, once on his leg, then on the neck, and the latest being his earlobes and the bottom of his jaw. So many scars and bruises. But he stood patient and strong through the arduous process of maggot elimination and the pain, oh gosh I can only imagine, But what I didn't expect, is when the suspected lump on his neck is fatal. 

I should have known better. 

He grew significantly weaker after the two maggot attacks. Then there was the fishy position of his neck. I honestly thought it was the scarred tissue as the outcome of the attacks at his neck. Little did I realise that it was actually a growth, a mass, by the time I realised it, and XRay test further showed complications. 

It was difficult, so difficult for me when Dr Adah told me that if his condition worsens up to the point that he cannot breathe, stand or eat, then the most humane thing to do is to euthanise him. 

Was alone at that time while speaking to her, wish I had company though. It's during times like this that a shoulder to cry on would be nice. I'm fine any other day, but breaking deathly news like this can be very heart-breaking. I gathered myself together and told her I'll speak to her again soon. 

The walk back with Rocky was a sad one. I spoke to him while walking back. I don't know if he understood, but somehow I knew, dogs know when they are nearing the end of their journey. 

This news was broken to me two days after I booked my flight to Australia. 

The day before that, Uncle Kwong also had a terrible news to share on his condition. 

One after another, that is why I told myself that this trip to Australia is going to be focused on one very important thing - Family. To spend time with the kids, my cousins, spend some alone time and gather my thoughts together, which I did. Cherished every moment with little, beautiful Maja. :) and Milosh, and everyone else too. 

Rocky is getting weaker by the day. He lies down while I bathe him, while the lump is getting bigger and bigger. Every night I'll still walk him, like I always do, but the routes are shorter now. 

At times he can't climb up the stairs, and so I'll carry him. 

Somehow, this disease has an upside. As I have always been the one to take care of him, now with his condition, sis is finally spending more quality time with him. I guess that's the one upside of this tragic news. 

In the words of a known author, it's not what happens to you, but how you react to it, that defines you for who you are. 

And it's in those moments you realise that when time is running short, that you would want to spend every waking moment with the ones that you care for and about. 

It's tough. So tough.